Man, I made a cute kid!

Seriously. Tiny Beast is adorable.

In the last blog, I mentioned that we did a photo shoot with Izzy. I debated back and forth whether to keep the ng tube in for the shoot, or to schedule it for a day when we would be changing it out, so I could see her full face, unobstructed. I opted to go with the latter. I have so many pictures of her with her tube, and even though that tube makes up part of who she is, I wanted a few with just her.  I never lose sight of how beautiful she is, but it sure was nice to see her without the tube.  I love her round cheeks and big bright eyes that look up to me during the day.

 And OH! she makes me laugh. Quite often, unintentionally. She's recently figured out she can stick her finger in her nose. Without her tube, she can cram both of them up there. Yep. My kid has skills.

 I look at her mischievous little smirks, and I know that in a few years I'm screwed. She has us wrapped around her little finger and she's a smart cookie already. I wonder what shenanigans she'll get into.

 I love how she will always rest well in my arms. I'll snuggle the daylights out of her, as long as she will let me. I know this phase will be gone before I know it.

She also is a patient little beast, letting me put tiny hats with fluffy ears on her. My heart melts when I look at this picture!

Tiny Beast just sits and observes between naps. She wants to see as many things as possible, and will just stare intently at you.

Every day I am so grateful for her, and the time off from work. She is an amazing, strong, silly little girl and I can't wait to see her grow and change. Even in the two weeks since these were taken, she has grown so much. She looks more and more like her Daddy and less and less like a grumpy old man. It's hard knowing her teeth will be here soon, and that cute gummy smile will disappear and that with each passing day, she'll need me less and less.

Luckily, this won't happen for a little while. It also means I have done my job well.  To you, Tiny Beast.  May all of your tiny dreams come true.  And to you, Dear Reader, may you find your happiness!
Raina

Tiny Turns Two

Tiny Beast is two months!  TWO!  The time has been flying by, and I'm already 2/3 through my leave. There really isn't enough time that I could spend with her.

She's getting so big, so fast. At her 8 week appointment, she was just over 24 inches tall, and almost 11.5 pounds. She's happiest when she's standing, and has found her hands and the art on the walls to be much more exciting than eating. She plays and coos and smiles at us and is just an amazing kid. She screams like a howler monkey and farts like a trucker, and she's everything I could ever want in a daughter.

We sit together and snuggle between naps, and we read books together. She sits on my lap while I write and on Nick while he plays video games. She's always interested in what we're doing and what the animals are doing. Much like her momma she doesn't sit still, fidgeting during feedings and playing with anything she can get her hands on. Her dreams are sweet, and we catch her smiling and laughing while she sleeps.  We're lucky in that she sleeps pretty well, mostly through the night these days.

This month we've had a wonderful photo shoot with a friend and local photographer, Michelle Smith-Lewis, whose work you can check out here. We loved working with her and I highly recommend her when you need a talented, patient photographer. We're also getting out more, and have been having fun between the feeds and the pumping sessions.  It's been nice to bring her out, to see friends and to get a routine in place for at least one day a week that isn't breast milk oriented. I took Izzy to the Veteran's Cemetery so I could visit my Dad. It's still strange to me that they won't ever meet. Next week, we're taking out first road trip to Cama Beach to stay in a cabin by the water. I can't wait to hike along the beach with her and sit under a blanket and watch the waves crash.

We continue to work with the specialists at Children's to get her off the feeding tube. There are good days and less good days. She's getting about one-third to half of her feed by bottle consistently, which is where she's been for some time. The goal is to have her at 100% of her 4 ounce feeds by bottle before we can let go of the tube feed process. It's been a slower road than I had hoped, but if this is the worst thing we have to deal with, so be it. We have an appointment next Friday to see what we can do to increase her bottle feeds. One step at a time. A related goal is to get her weight up. She's not gaining as fast as the pediatrician would like, despite adding extra calories with formula to her full breast milk feeds, we'll be working with the dietitian at Children's early next week on that part, along with her Specialist and the nurses. I can't say enough how amazing Children's has been. Their knowledge, empathy and coordination of care has been remarkable. We are so lucky to have them working with Izzy.

Her test results continue to come back strong, her CO2 and her oxygen levels are right where they should be, her developmental targets are still being hit on time, if not earlier. She continues to amaze me as well her doctors. Again, we're still so lucky.

I hope you all are doing well, and that life is full of good updates for you all as well!

Best,
Raina, Izzy and Nick.

A Beery Review

One of the things I missed during pregnancy was Beer Friday. Every Friday, a group of us would hit a local brewery and have drinks, hit the local pub and grab dinner. It was the social time that I missed, and I won't lie; after a long week, a beer (or a few) was a welcomed treat.  The picture above is from a trip to Glacier National Park, where I happily lounged in my hammock with one of my favorite beers, Baron Brewing's Uber-Weisse. Shortly after Jen and I got pregnant, the brewery went out of business. That was our Friday staple. Coincidence?  Who knows.

I worried that once I had Tiny Beast I wouldn't be able to hit any fun places for a Friday treat. Babies and bars don't mix so well. Luckily, most brewery taprooms ARE kid friendly and are much more quiet, and well, less full of drunk, touchy, and germy people.

Without further adieu, I offer a column for all of us who want to get out and have a night out with an adult beverage, but who have their kids in tow. As I hit new breweries, I'll add them to the blog as Beer Friday, and write my reviews. If there's anything that would be helpful to read about, leave a comment and I'll add that in for future additions. If there's a place that you know of in Washington or else where, please add that as well! I'm sure I should put in a disclaimer that you should never drink and drive and that you should keep your imbibing to a level that doesn't impair your ability to care for your kid. I'll assume you are a savvy adult and have mastered common sense, but just in case...please see my prior sentence.

The rundown so far:
Big Al's Brewing-White Center (Seattle).
I love this place. It's no Baron, but it's close. The bartender noted that he hadn't seen me in ages and was super excited to hear about Tiny Beast. They also have a board for "Beer it Forward", so you can buy someone a beer who isn't there with you. It's nice as its mostly the same folks each time, so you know what you're getting into. There's two stories, and kids are welcome upstairs. There are couches and a big screen, darts, board games and an Atari. AN ATARI!  If that doesn't sell it right there, I don't know what does!  The beers are solid, and they rotate guest taps. They play soccer, but that's about as sporty as this place gets.  right now, I am loving their Blonde.
Parking? Plentiful, but street
Noise level? Upstairs isn't bad and you can carry on a conversation without raising your voice
Beers on a scale of 1-10? 8. Nick says 7. I say he's silly.
Food? None, but they do have a Soup thing on Sundays and you are welcome to bring your own food-there's great Soul Food, pho and a BBQ joint close by. Oh, and Full Tilt Ice cream. So good.
Playtime? Fellow parents bring their kids, too.
Website? http://www.bigalbrewing.com/

Machine House Brewing-Georgetown (Seattle)
This is a new brewery and the third in Georgetown and that shows in the set up-pretty sparse. It's not super obvious where it is, so it can be hard to find. What does that mean for you? It's not cram packed full of hipsters prefunking prior to hitting another bar. The vibe is mellow, and it's in an old Machine house along Airport Way. The beer list is still small, there were 4 beers available when we went, but they were good. I had the Machine House Mild-an English Dark Mild. It was what I would want to drink in the summer, when it was too hot for a Guinness. Yep, a light bodied dark beer. Nick had the Bitter, a smooth beer that wasn't overwhelmingly hoppy. We're heading back there Friday with friends and will try something else.  They also had a gingered version of their Gold. It reminded me of my days drinking with the guys from Trade Route Brewing, before they moved south and changed and then were bought out.  Nostalgia aside...this wasn't my favorite beer. If the ginger was toned down, I'd like it more. Of note-this place is COLD. Seriously. Its in an old machine house, with high ceilings, and big windows. Bring a coat, and bundle up the tots. I wore gloves.
Parking: Lot and Street (yay!), but it is Georgetown so keep that in mind for Friday & Saturday nights
Noise Level? We went on a Sunday afternoon, so it was pretty quiet. I'll update after going Friday night.
Beers on a scale of 1-10? Nick says 8, I say 7
Food? Nope, but they have peanuts and outside food is ok, which is great, since Stellar Pizza is just down the street
Playtime? We saw one other couple there with a toddler. There's a wooden train set toy and a fair amount of seating
Website? http://www.machinehousebrewery.com/

Urban Family Brewing-Ballard (Seattle)
I bought a Living Social deal for them, which prompted me to check them out. They have a few beers of their own and they choose really awesome guest taps. I had a Maritime Navigator Dunkle that I loved, and Nick had an End of Reason from Gigantic Brewing-also super delish. We got there about 7 pm, and they were already out of their own beers (after opening at 5), which was a bummer, but they did have a little of their Pils on reserve. Since we came out and had Tiny Beast in tow, they comped us a beer for free (yay!). The customer service was awesome. The gal had us try quite a few samples after asking us what we were into, she was fast and super attentive.  The food was really good too. Nick had the Smokehouse burger with chili and I had the Bacon & Blue with a salad. They have a couple appetizers, and a vegetarian option. One thing to note, this place makes their burgers right, pinkish red in the middle. Yum!
Parking? Ugh. It's Ballard. Street parking takes a while to find.
Noise Level? This place is pretty packed and there's music and a lot of people talking. Keep that in mind if your kiddo is overwhelmed easily.
Food? Yes!  YAY!  Burgers run about $11, with a side.
Playtime? We saw one other baby there
Beers on a scale of 1-10? Guest taps, 9. Their beer, the pils was a 6. Not sure about the others.
Website? http://www.urbanfamilypublichouse.com/

Well, there's the start folks. Next on tap (ha, get it?) will be Two Beers (where all the Baron patrons seemed to have gone off to) and Schooner Exact, a tap room I haven't been for over a year.

What family friendly tap rooms do you like?
Best,
Raina

Spring Forward!

We. Had. Sun!

To some of you that isn't a big deal, but here in the Northwest, sunny days this time of year are amazing and rare! They hold the promise that Spring is close, and summer...well, it must be right around the corner. Of course, sun doesn't mean warmth here, but you'll still see people out in their shorts and tees in 50 degree weather, including the socks and sandals combo (I still don't get that, I like my galoshes).  I love, love, love Spring and am pretty darn excited to see my bulbs coming in and starting to bloom. T

Nick and his Dad have been doing the hard labor to get the yard and garden beds ready for me, so I can start planting my veggies, herbs and fruits. Last year, I didn't quite get the garden I wanted-a lot of time was spent handling family issues and other more important tasks, but I did manage to get some amazing tomatoes planted. You can see a bit more of that garden here.  There's nothing quite like the taste of a fresh picked tomato. Yum.

I have some rough plans mapped out, I have 2 long and narrow beds, one large 10X10 bed and a 4X4 bed along with containers that hold all I like to plant. There's some work to do, but with maternity leave, I have had time to map everything out and start a list of what I will be planting. I can't wait to get out there this week and next and get dirty!

On tap for this week:
Dead heading! I have a few crops, mostly herbs, that just don't die back. I trim off the old, woody stuff and let the new growth come up. Yesterday, I saw that the mint I planted in the main bed bolted. Note to self-mint should go in a container or it takes over everything. I'll be digging all of that up, and giving some to friends, drying some, and putting the rest in a container. I also have wild mint that grows in the rose beds by my front door. I need to trim that up, too.
Soil amending!  I need to boost up the nutrients and till everything up to make the soil nice and fluffy. I like to add compost, extra soil and a nitrogen/super whatever the store makes amender goop that I toss in. I'll add the name when I order it, I sadly only know it by the picture-I'm screwed if the label ever changes.
Starting seeds! I have a few varieties of squash and tomatoes and bell peppers that I'll be starting in little containers in my dining room.
Plant Sale! Seattle Tilth has amazing plant sales in March and May. You can buy seeds and starts and get expert advice from fellow gardeners.
Planting starts! I'll be planting my peas, broccoli, artichoke, kale, chard and some lettuce this week to give them plenty of time to get started. I'm not quite sure of the varieties of each, I'll pick and choose as I go.  Next week or the week after (weather dependent), I'll plant beans.  I'm also excited to use the wrought iron trellises from my Dad's house.

Usually, Spring is spent adding something new to the garden every week. Sometimes I pick up too many plants late in the season, and they sit in their little containers until I get too busy to plant them, and they die a sad planty death. This year, I hope to avoid that!  Here' some garden shots for you-the first is of one of my giant squash-the plants yielded so many and this one wasn't the largest. The next is a dewy tulip bulb from my front gardens!

This year, I am involved in something new! I'm part of a group that will be doing a progressive backyard farm tour, complete with snacks, drinks and eventually a dinner. That's in two weeks, which is just enough time to wake up the garden and get things started. We'll be visiting bees, chickens, fellow gardens and even get a stop in to peek at some goats. Yep. We have it all here in South Park! Henny is quite excited for visitors ;)

I'll post pictures as I go, and keep folks up to date on what I planted that worked and what didn't work so well. I'll also get pictures of the goats, too!

What are your favorite cool weather crops?  Any garden plans for you all? This week for you readers, please post a comment, and I'll pick a winner at random on Friday and send packets of my favorite seeds just in time for Spring! :)

Best to you all!
Raina

Tiny Beasts' Tiny Lair

People have been asking for pictures of the nursery, and since Tiny Beast is down for a nap, I thought I'd post some pictures.  Much of the furniture and decorations are either things from my childhood, or from local artists, or handmade by me.  I wanted to go with a woodland theme, with a lot of critters and earth tones.  You'll see that there is a Queen Anne buffet in the nursery; normally a crib would live in that spot, but since Izzy has to sleep in a harness on her belly, we moved the crib into our bedroom, since the bassinet won't work for anything but supervised naps.  I'm really happy how it turned out-it's warm, just sunny enough, and there's a nice tree that attracts a lot of birds just outside. It's been a great spot to pump and rock her when she's fussy during the day.

This is where the crib normally lives. The banner is made of fabric and flowers, and spells out her name. It's attached to willow reeds that hold little critters!

 The pictures are each of her ultrasound pictures, with space for one more picture of her now that she is here (gotta get on that!).

 We wanted to bring in family pictures-my great, great grandparents, Nick's great and grandparents, my Mom and Dad are here too, along with a plate with written wishes from my baby showers.

 Along with the woodland theme, we incorporated Tom Clark Gnomes that my parents used to collect, along with fossilized wood my Dad and I collected and polished, and a tree stump jewelry box my Dad made when I was little.  For those of you who know me, I collect rocks, so I added a few of those in too. They are tucked around the nursery in little spots, just out of the reach of little hands.

Here is the corner-a butterfly print from Ikea (Nick calls me Mariposa, so I wanted to add that in). There are the curtains that I made (also with gnomes) and the butterfly mobile from my friend Liz. The pink blob in the corner is crystal cluster specimen collected by my Dad and I from a sulfur flat. Every year, we would go to this remote location and hop in, or stand on the edge of suflur pits, and break off these massive chunks of pink salt crystals.  We'd come home caked in salt, smelling of rotting eggs, with a few amazing specimens. While I don't remember it being my favorite activity, looking back on it, it was a great time.

These pictures are from Justin Hargrove, an artist whose work I adore. It's Disney meets Creepy, and I just love them!

Continuing with the woodland theme, we have more critters, another Hilgrove picture, and porcelain figures my parents picked up in England-these are also scattered around the nursery, like the rocks and the gnomes. The squirrel is oddly, a dog toy from my first dog as an adult, and the tree is drift wood from one of my first trips to the Washington coast. Pretty much everything has a story behind it here, and I am happy to have reused things I had laying around.

Most things in this picture are from my childhood as well-I can't wait to share my love of books with Izzy as she grows. Right now, she seems to like "Hands, Hands, Fingers, Thumb".

We had to acknowledge our even nerdier side, adding in some Star Wars pieces here and there too. 

We decided to put the mobile on her changing table, since she sleeps on her belly. That was an awesome idea. She doesn't cry when we change her, as she is too distracted by the tiny owl and hedgehog. We have been doing cloth diapering, and I LOVE the Gdiaper system-so easy.

The rocking chair was the one that my parents used with me, the old well-loved bear was given to my mom when my parents were dating, and then given to me. I chewed his nose off, and squeezed the stuffing into his legs. The antique quilt on the back of the chair has the letters of the alphabet and images sewn on. It's just big enough to cover Izzy and I when she's fussy. I had originally intended to use the footstool as a  footstool, but found that it makes the perfect end  table for books, snacks, my pump and anything else I need close by. I recovered with with wood grain patterned fabric. The curtains are from Ikea and were cute AND super cheap. What more do you need?

This lamp is a work in progress. Those circle glue dots don't hold well, so I'll be using my hot glue gun to finish this bad boy, you get the idea though.

Lastly, the rug-from Ikea-it's super cute and just big enough.  It's adorable, and works well with the rest of the items in Tiny Beasts nursery.

That's the tour! Lots of love, cute recycled items, and a good sense of our past and family to share with Izzy.

What did you incorporate into your personal space/nurseries that make you smile?

Cheers,
Raina

The days are long, but the years are short.

An older gal told me this in passing the other week while at a doctors visit, mentioning that I should cherish these days, as they all fly by.

It's so true already. Tiny Beast is just over a month, and the past few weeks are mostly a blur, and it feels like so long ago that we had her. It also feels like it's gone by in a flash.  For those of you who are new to the blog, you can read more about Tiny Beast's arrival here.

The days are spent pumping, bottle and tube feeding her every 3 hours, about a half gallon of breast milk a day. The other hours are spent snuggling her ever-growing body in beams of sunlight or under antique quilts, and journaling our adventures in my tiny notebook. I don't do as many crafts as I used to, instead, the time is spent doting over and gazing at her tiny features.  After nearly a decade of wanting her and planning for her, I am still amazed that she is here.

Her weight is increasing so well, and she is eating more and more by bottle-usually more than half her total feed.  We continue to try breastfeeding, and she gets better with each attempt. Sometimes she just screams at my chest, which doesn't do either of us much good. It's all just for the closeness, and when that doesn't work, we grab a bottle of milk and snuggle together instead. Her tests continue to come back strong, indicating that she won't have any side effects from the fluid on her lungs, or the cleft pallet. We're still so, so lucky. The doctors are amazed at her development, and excited to see what else she can accomplish-she's hitting milestones ahead of time, which feels good after the challenges the first week brought. We have a great team at two hospitals who want to see her be as healthy as possible.

We have had amazing support in friends and family, between meals being delivered and house keeping/gardening help, we've been able to relax. The cards, and calls have all been so welcomed and I can't say enough how amazed I am for the amount of love this kid has. Thank you all, so much!  I suck at asking for help, and am way better at saying 'thank you'. I know it takes a village, and I am grateful for an amazing village.

We're still cooking up a storm, which feels good. The food blog will be updated this week with my gumbo and pot pie recipes.  We're also getting out more, seeing friends and having people over. The normalcy feels good.

Of course, it's not all cuteness and happy times. Tiny Beast can yell. In addition to that skill, she can also poop up a storm. I had no clue of the sheer volume of poo and noises that something so small can produce.

This whole experience has really forced by to evaluate who I am, and how I live, and all my attempts at planning anything have gone out the window. She's making me a better person every moment, and I am so grateful for that. Even at 2 am, when she starts wailing, when I just laid back down after pumping and tube feeding her for the past hour.

We're still learning about what works and what doesn't, and I know that will be an ongoing activity, but for now, her laughs and smiles are all the motivation I need.  I leave you with a quick picture from her birthday. She was not amused.

All my best to you all, as you find your way through chaotic times :)
Raina

On being home

Dorothy said, "there's no place like home".

So many times in the last 6 days I wished that I could click my heels together and come home. I wanted to be away from the alarms, the noise, and to allow Isabella to know that people don't normally smell like hand sanitizer.  I wanted my bed, and to have her in her crib. I wanted to eat food that didn't have mayonnaise as a main ingredient.

The idea that we would be going home soon was so exciting and really helped to get us through. At each feeding, I talked to Isabella about our adventure plans, and told her about all the things we had for her at home. It's amazing how small things like that can help you block out the challenging things.

Sunday, it looked like we would be able to go home early in the week, provided she passed her hearing test, her CO2 test and her carseat test. We also needed to have all of her equipment ordered and we needed to learn nasalgastric tube feeding and placement (say that three times fast!).  Monday, first thing, we started banging out the tests. Blood was taken, equipment ordered, ng tube placement was done on the fly as my little beast pulled her tube out. Nick ran into our Specialist in the cafeteria, who let us know that she had passed her blood work-she looked good!  The feeding equipment came, and we were taught how to use it (we had been learning all week from the nursing staff, which sure helped). Audiology came out, and ran the needed tests-she aced 4 out of 4 of them. It was looking good!

It was time for the car seat challenge. 90 minutes in the car seat you brought with out any dips in oxygen saturation or vitals. She had to be able to breathe smoothly, and well...fit.  I'm pretty sure Nick and I held our breath for the first minute. Our eyes bounced between Izzy, the monitor and the clock.  Every time a stat dipped, so did our hope of getting out of there.  Finally, the 90 minutes were up. She had passed and we didn't need one more piece of equipment.

Close to 6 pm, we realized that the last piece of equipment, the oxymeter, hadn't been delivered. We couldn't leave before it came. The nurse had already tried calling the care coordinators, but they had left at 4. I opted to call the company directly. They asked when were to be discharged, as they didn't want to send before then and I kindly let them know it was a few hours prior, and could they please bring the equipment so we could just get home?  In my head, I wanted to reach through the phone and shake the holy hell out of the guy, but this wasn't his fault. :)

The equipment was delivered shortly after, and we started to pack. At 11:30 pm, almost one week after heading to the hospital, we were given our walking papers and allowed to go home. Walking through the entry way into the cranial-facial section was the most exciting thing ever! As we got closer to the exit, I wanted to start running. I knew we were good to leave, I just didn't want anyone changing their minds...Leaving felt so amazing. Things were going to be normal again!!! This is our holy crap, we're tired, but getting the hell out of the hospital picture!

We woke my mom up when we got home (she had been watching the critters for us), and she was so excited. We all were. Next was the task of setting everything up, and plotting how to surprise Nick's folks. We slept soundly on an air mattress in her nursery, so happy to be home.

The next day brought plotting to surprise Nick's family, especially his Dad, whose birthday it was.  We had so many people to coordinate and getting the dog home, that we decided to let Nick's mom organize it. She was great, making sure everyone knew just what to do!  We were able to surprise him, and Izzy got to meet her Great Grandma, too.

The week has gone by, some days longer than others.  This blog has taken me multiple days to write, mostly done when pumping, since I can't go anywhere for 30 minutes, every two hours.

Izzy continues to amaze us-sometimes with how much she can cry-man does that kid have lungs!  But she also amazes us in how focused she is and snuggly.  She is already close to 9 lbs, and has grown an inch-all within her first week here.  She's such a little trooper!

It feels good to be home and to know that for at least 11 weeks, all I have to is pump, rest, and do everything I can to make her happy.  There isn't much more that I need in this life :)

Here's to your happiness and always coming home.  Below the picture is a quote that fits us well :)

"Three is a magic number,
Yes it is, it's a magic number.
Somewhere in the ancient, mystic trinity
You get three as a magic number.

The past and the present and the future.
Faith and Hope and Charity,
The heart and the brain and the body
Give you three as a magic number.  [...]

A man and a woman had a little baby,
Yes, they did.
They had three in the family,
And that's a magic number."

~Schoolhouse Rock, 'Three is a Magic Number'

Cheers
Raina, Nick and Isabella