That is really the only way that today can be described. Blame it on hormones, too many cookies, or just a lack of patience, today can suck it. I'm not normally a grumpy person. In fact, I usually get the feedback that my perkiness level could use a little dialing down. Today, I am just in a grumpy mood.
One of my biggest pet peeves is when people fail to meet basic expectations-on life, on promises, or just in general at functioning as a entry level adult. It's not really hard-put on your big boy/girl pants, take a shower and get your shit-show on the road. Don't make promises that you can't and won't keep, and don't make promises that are conditional. It makes you..well...It makes you a damn asshat, for a lack of a better word. I seem to be running into situations where when push comes to shove, and grown up decisions are being made, people bail. It happens, but it seems to be happening a lot.
Deeeeeeep Exhale. Ok. Now that's off of my shoulders and out of my head...updates!!!
Now that football season is officially behind us, and the sun has been coming out more, its time to get out and get gardening! I started some lettuce and pac choy this weekend, and started to map out the garden beds. The chickens have been doing their best to keep the weeds in check, and I am enjoying hearing their happy little clucks as they have their dirt bath.
I'm closer to finishing a quilt, but the one that I have been working on for years sits to the side. I think I have hit a place that I am feeling stuck, so I'll probably just put it away to pull it out at a later date.
There's some other changes in the works, but I am not quite ready to get into them, its all good stuff, just waiting for now.
Hope all is well, and your level of asshattery is at a minimum.
Best
Raina
No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.
P. J. O'Rourke
Monday, February 6, 2012
Thursday, January 19, 2012
Oh snow....
Have I mentioned that I love warm outfits? The idea of battling snow to go play drives me nuts, but I do love the idea of warm pretty clothes if I do have to venture out. Here's what I love for this cold snowy weather!
So far...
1. I have so much work to do, which means more work to do tomorrow and Friday
2. There are tiny snow flakes that I should be playing in! Tiny snowflakes, people. Did I ever mention to you that I have a sled?
The snow will have to wait for the redness and swollen wonkiness that is happening in my throat.
2012 is now 18 days in. So far, its been pretty good.
I have been working on my 2012 list, and my life list-the things that I want to accomplish. I feel like there's always a life inside of me that isn't being fully lived. Being sick reminds me of that, and how much I can't stand sitting still. I'll be posting a new blog shortly, with some pretty pics of a type out goal list, so stay tuned for that.
In the mean time, I feel a nap coming on, as I sit next to a warm fire surrounded by tiny furry bodies.
Saturday, January 7, 2012
2011...my review
Oh, 2011. I have so much to say about you, but I have no idea where to start.
You brought innumerable moments of exquisite bliss, soul crushing hardships, sun-filled happiness. Each day, week and month brought something new.
I rang in 2011 in an Irish Pub and hotel room in San Francisco with a man who I believed was the one I would be with for the rest of my life. I was engaged and had found out a few days earlier that we weren't pregnant. We remarked that it was sad, but good timing as we had wanted to go to Napa as part of our bucket list.
3 months later, I lost a friend suddenly, which made me question every decision I had been making. I started to question why my relationship was so complicated, whether I wanted to continue in my current line of work. It made me think about so much. Life was suddenly surprisingly short, and I didn't want to wait any more for things to happen. I put ultimatums on friendships and my relationship, I needed people in my life who could commit to being there, who had the same goals as I did.
Lying in bed Easter weekend, the person I had been best friends with for close to 17 years and I decided to call it quits. Just like that, we were done. It was simple-we just didn't want the same things in life. He hadn't wanted to tell me he didn't want kids as he wanted me, and didn't want to lose me. We cried with each other, not moving, not wanting to admit it was really over. We got up and bought a ham, and cooked one of the best last dinners we would have together. Some months later, he had a change of heart. I tried to keep him around as long as I could, but I couldn't get past the hurt. 2011 closed with us deciding it would be better to just go our separate ways completely.
2011 brought the realization that my father's PTSD will never be under control, and making the hard decision to cut him out of my life. It's painful watching the ones you love hurt themselves and others, and knowing that there isn't anything that you can do about it. I hope that some day he can be a part of my life again, but I'm not holding my breath.
But 2011 wasn't all bad, oh no!
I had lovely adventures-travelling through Washington, Oregon and Northern California and to Eastern Washington and Leavenworth. And I did get to drink plenty of Napa Valley Cabs.
I was promoted and received a nice raise, a lot earlier than expected. Work was busy, and we launched the Veterans Administration as a major pilot program.
I did crafts, and did some photography, although I didn't do any shows. I committed to making this a goal for 2012 though. I bought vintage and antique cameras, and tried my hand at painting.
I met an amazing man, at a time when my heart didn't want to be open to anyone. He offered me bacon before I even knew his name. He convinced me that I should give him my number, I convinced a stranger that this guy should cater his daughters wedding. I had known him for 2 hours. We went on a first date, ok...let me back up. We scheduled a first date, and I freaked out, so I pushed it out a few days. After all, I had been in a relationship for years. I wasn't ready. He was young. I was a mess. What if I got hurt again? After a quick pep talk from a friend, I jumped. We had our first date. I walked up, he was pacing and he looked nervous. It was cute. I was freaking out. Maybe it wasn't too late to run back to my car...and then he saw me and smiled. It was like seeing someone I had known all my life, and suddenly it was all ok. We sat outside at a local brewery, the sun was shining, and the beer was good. We talked about food, and our lives and what we both did. The conversation flowed naturally, there weren't awkward pauses. He insisted on paying the tab. I drove him to his house, a cute mint green craftsman. I liked him already. I blared Adele all the way home smiling. I sent my friend a text thanking him for making me say yes to the date. Our next date brought me to his house for a home cooked meal. He had worked hard to clean the house, threw his roommates out and even borrowed a tablecloth. He gathered flowers from his yard and the neighborhood. We had bacon wrapped dates with blue cheese, and bacon wrapped stuffed chicken. I brought wine. Again, the conversation flowed.
Weeks turned into months, and each day I find myself smiling about how bacon fixed a broken heart. I catch him looking at me, and I smile. I know I am loved and cared for, because of who I am and I am lucky to have found that. Not everyone finds so much love.
Despite the lows, this year was good. After all, how can you appreciate the great things, if you don't experience any hardships? I learned what I am willing to let go of, and what means enough for me to fight for. I learned that I am strong, capable and empowered. I can live on my own, I can do things, and I should never have to hope for the life I want. I have it.
Here's to an amazing 2012, my best to all of you. :)
Raina
“Sadness flies on the wings of the morning and out of the heart of darkness comes the light.” - Jean Giraudoux
You brought innumerable moments of exquisite bliss, soul crushing hardships, sun-filled happiness. Each day, week and month brought something new.
I rang in 2011 in an Irish Pub and hotel room in San Francisco with a man who I believed was the one I would be with for the rest of my life. I was engaged and had found out a few days earlier that we weren't pregnant. We remarked that it was sad, but good timing as we had wanted to go to Napa as part of our bucket list.
3 months later, I lost a friend suddenly, which made me question every decision I had been making. I started to question why my relationship was so complicated, whether I wanted to continue in my current line of work. It made me think about so much. Life was suddenly surprisingly short, and I didn't want to wait any more for things to happen. I put ultimatums on friendships and my relationship, I needed people in my life who could commit to being there, who had the same goals as I did.
Lying in bed Easter weekend, the person I had been best friends with for close to 17 years and I decided to call it quits. Just like that, we were done. It was simple-we just didn't want the same things in life. He hadn't wanted to tell me he didn't want kids as he wanted me, and didn't want to lose me. We cried with each other, not moving, not wanting to admit it was really over. We got up and bought a ham, and cooked one of the best last dinners we would have together. Some months later, he had a change of heart. I tried to keep him around as long as I could, but I couldn't get past the hurt. 2011 closed with us deciding it would be better to just go our separate ways completely.
2011 brought the realization that my father's PTSD will never be under control, and making the hard decision to cut him out of my life. It's painful watching the ones you love hurt themselves and others, and knowing that there isn't anything that you can do about it. I hope that some day he can be a part of my life again, but I'm not holding my breath.
But 2011 wasn't all bad, oh no!
I had lovely adventures-travelling through Washington, Oregon and Northern California and to Eastern Washington and Leavenworth. And I did get to drink plenty of Napa Valley Cabs.
I was promoted and received a nice raise, a lot earlier than expected. Work was busy, and we launched the Veterans Administration as a major pilot program.
I did crafts, and did some photography, although I didn't do any shows. I committed to making this a goal for 2012 though. I bought vintage and antique cameras, and tried my hand at painting.
I met an amazing man, at a time when my heart didn't want to be open to anyone. He offered me bacon before I even knew his name. He convinced me that I should give him my number, I convinced a stranger that this guy should cater his daughters wedding. I had known him for 2 hours. We went on a first date, ok...let me back up. We scheduled a first date, and I freaked out, so I pushed it out a few days. After all, I had been in a relationship for years. I wasn't ready. He was young. I was a mess. What if I got hurt again? After a quick pep talk from a friend, I jumped. We had our first date. I walked up, he was pacing and he looked nervous. It was cute. I was freaking out. Maybe it wasn't too late to run back to my car...and then he saw me and smiled. It was like seeing someone I had known all my life, and suddenly it was all ok. We sat outside at a local brewery, the sun was shining, and the beer was good. We talked about food, and our lives and what we both did. The conversation flowed naturally, there weren't awkward pauses. He insisted on paying the tab. I drove him to his house, a cute mint green craftsman. I liked him already. I blared Adele all the way home smiling. I sent my friend a text thanking him for making me say yes to the date. Our next date brought me to his house for a home cooked meal. He had worked hard to clean the house, threw his roommates out and even borrowed a tablecloth. He gathered flowers from his yard and the neighborhood. We had bacon wrapped dates with blue cheese, and bacon wrapped stuffed chicken. I brought wine. Again, the conversation flowed.
Weeks turned into months, and each day I find myself smiling about how bacon fixed a broken heart. I catch him looking at me, and I smile. I know I am loved and cared for, because of who I am and I am lucky to have found that. Not everyone finds so much love.
Despite the lows, this year was good. After all, how can you appreciate the great things, if you don't experience any hardships? I learned what I am willing to let go of, and what means enough for me to fight for. I learned that I am strong, capable and empowered. I can live on my own, I can do things, and I should never have to hope for the life I want. I have it.
Here's to an amazing 2012, my best to all of you. :)
Raina
“Sadness flies on the wings of the morning and out of the heart of darkness comes the light.” - Jean Giraudoux
Monday, September 26, 2011
One more post for the day...about being handy-or not.
A while ago I posted on Facebook about "Why I am not Bob Villa", and took a few minutes to jot down a conversation about my version of home improvement. After an adventure today in cleaning my gutters, I decided to post both notes for everyone's entertainment :) Enjoy!
Housework, if it is done right, can kill you. ~John Skow
Why I am not Bob Villa: Saturday, July 2, 2011 at 2:03pm
I really am being productive today, despite the many facebook additions. This was just too funny not to share. Well, in my head any ways. This is a text convo between a friend and I. Please note, my friend is way more handy than I am, I'm guessing. This convo proved it:
Me: Did you know you have to build screens? They don't come pre-built! WTH? Do I look handy?
Friend: Screens?
Me: Yeah, for windows
Friend: Window sizes tend to be different. I can give you a hand.
Me: Phew. Cause I may lose an eye building it. I thought I was being slick using the one I found in my garage, but then I almost stabbed myself (I was using a pair of scissors to make it go together), and then the damn screen was too small for the window, and I was like, WTH? Why do I even have this screen? Do I even have windows this small?! Sigh. I may just drink.
Friend: Do you need real tools?
Me: Probably. I could have used a screw driver. That would have worked better. It's also less stabby.
Friend: Do you not have one?
Me: I do, it was just in the house.
This convo went on, and included mention of setting myself up for success by not using scissors-which by the way I had used earlier to dig up a carrot and poke at a bug. And this is why I shouldn't be allowed around sharp objects. Or windows. or Home Depot.
Why I am still not Bob Villa, Or How I didn't bust my ass in the rain: September 26th.
While working from home today, I noticed that water was just dribbling down the eaves of my roof. I am assuming that's what the sides of my roof are called. See...you get where this is going already, right?
Either way, I decided that I was going to clean my gutters today. Armed with a ladder and a knitting needle, I ventured outside.
Wait....you don't clean your gutters with a knitting needle? Did you read my earlier note about putting a screen together with scissors? Clearly, you're just now catching on to my improvised handimanliness. Yes, I also make up words.
So...I go outside armed with the tools of my trade, and set up the ladder...which takes all of like 5 minutes as there's some stupid release mechanism involved. Once done I put it down and test it. Its not too wobbly, so I decide to climb up. This is when a big drop of roof water falls into my eye. I am not at the right spot to set up the ladder, but I did identify where water is falling. I move the ladder on to the porch by the downspout and climb up again, with much more success and less water in my eye. Now....smart-ass...this is where the knitting needle comes in handy. I think "there MUST be a clog in the downspout", so I start poking around. Nope. No clog. So I look around...the issue is all this goop that is filling up the stupid external gutters and making a bird pool on my roof.
Awesome.
I then proceed to poke at that with my knitting needle to no avail - the goop is too far away. Sigh. I start to climb down, only to notice some big ass black thing is moving towards my rain-water filled eye. Apparently I managed to give a spider a ride on my head. At this point, I am done, covered in rain water, about to start screaming and waving my arms like a crazy person, all while perched precariously on my porch on a slick ladder. I remove said stupid spider and climb down off the ladder and decide two things:
1. I am still not Bob Villa
2. I shouldn't be allowed to fix my house. Period.
Thank you to everyone who has volunteered to teach me how to do this. I now owe you beer. =D
My fall wardrobe
I love, love, LOVE fall. I get excited every time the weather changes and the leaves start changes. I think about using the fire place and making coq au vin, and pumpkins and doing more crafts. I also love pulling out my fall clothes, including scarves. I dont normally post about clothes, but after playing on Polyvore.com (another site you NEED to check out), I couldn't help post what I want to wear this season. Enjoy a peek into my style, from what I can't wait to wear to work, on the town and to go play in the leaves :)
My fall wardrobe by rainaanderson
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My fall wardrobe by rainaanderson
Sunday, September 25, 2011
What's that sound??? Its the sound of me being productive!
I've been stuck on the website pinterest.com lately...if you haven't seen it, you should check it out...Its a neat site where people "pin" things that they like from various websites, based on various interests. *Disclaimer*: The site is awesome, and you can easily waste hours upon hours viewing it all. So what have I been up to lately?
Canning! I took nearly 45 pounds of tomatoes and made them into sauce. I now have more sauce then I will need for some time-I'm definitely set for winter!
I've also been trying my damnedest to work on my quilt. Its been years since I started it...I get a little bit done, and then I get bored, and back into the bin it goes. Its made up of tiny 4" squares from the Amy Butler "Daisy Chain" line. 4 sets of 4" squares are sewn together, and then sewn to other color coordinated groups of tiny squares. You see why I only get so far? :) Here's a pic, so you get an idea of what it looks like:
While obviously not a car, I loved how even the graffiti in my 'hood is wonderful :)
Canning! I took nearly 45 pounds of tomatoes and made them into sauce. I now have more sauce then I will need for some time-I'm definitely set for winter!
I've also been trying my damnedest to work on my quilt. Its been years since I started it...I get a little bit done, and then I get bored, and back into the bin it goes. Its made up of tiny 4" squares from the Amy Butler "Daisy Chain" line. 4 sets of 4" squares are sewn together, and then sewn to other color coordinated groups of tiny squares. You see why I only get so far? :) Here's a pic, so you get an idea of what it looks like:
Again, a lot of little squares=a lot of a pain to complete.
I've also spent the last two weekends doing a little photography. There's been a few events in the neighborhood, which allowed me to get in some shots. First up was Fiestas Patrias, which travels right down my street-super convenient!
The parade is bright, festive and overall quite fun. I spent some of today cropping the pics and deleting some I just didn't like. In addition to Fiestas Patrias, there was the First Annual South Park Car Show-Again, really close, allowing me to take some fun shots. I don't really enjoy taking pics of cars as a whole, just pieces of them:
While obviously not a car, I loved how even the graffiti in my 'hood is wonderful :)
Today also yielded a new project, as I felt like I just needed to complete something-using an old stamp between two tiny pieces of glass, to make a magnet. Finally being a stamp collecting dork pays off!!!
I am still getting used to using the metal tape, and can see that I need some practice, and a bone folder to make it look a little nicer, but not bad for 5 minutes of work. The other side is vintage style paper. Cute and fun.
So whats on tap next?
Work. We're launching a big client, so my world seems to be revolving around that. I am also working to throw a benefit concert/event for a friend whose cancer has returned. No one should have to choose between paying for medical care and living expenses. Lastly, possibly a short road trip this weekend. It'll be nice to get out of town before work becomes too busy to take time off.
I hope this has been a good, fun read. I also hope you check out pinterest.com; its motivated me to get off my bum and craft, maybe it will do the same for you!
Cheers,
Cheers,
Raina
All of us have wonders hidden in our breasts, only needing circumstances to evoke them. ~Charles Dickens
Plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. ~Veronica A. Shoffstall, "After a While," 1971
And no big surprise....all images copy write 2011-Tiger Lily Designs
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